Inner Arnie

The more I think about the past few weeks and the distress I have been in, the more I realize that I really need to find a way to block things out. Why do I have to be so stinkin' sensitive? I have been this way my entire life though. I'm the peacekeeper of my family, my friendships and my co-workers. Here is the problem with being sensitive and feeling the need to fix things...I don't have complete control over my job, my life, my world; this is just a fact. This is not to say that I will give up and take on a bit of a victim status. All I really can do is to recognize that by carrying around this frustration and anxiety from situations I have no control over will do me no good. Somehow I am going to block out these situational problems that I can not fix and focus on the fact that I did my best and that is it.

These situational problems are truly starting to feel like poison to me. They seep in and bring out the worst in me. I have a feeling though that if I can learn to control my emotions and what I let effect me, I will truly be a happier person. This morning I gave myself a little pep talk to start out my week. I was that crazy lady you see talking to herself in her car. As I was driving I was thinking of when I started personal training. I started needing to find ways to block out the sheer physical pain and override it. I started thinking about Arnold Schwarzenegger and his fitness. I'm no fan of Arnold, but you have to admit that man has some come to Jesus discipline with his fitness. I would start to tell Chris(my trainer) that I needed to find my "inner Arnie" when I felt like if I did another lunge I would fall over and die. This mental change would actually help me finish my workout and at times motivate those around me. My training classmates would scream at me when our thighs were burning hotter than a forest fire, "Lis- Where the hell is Arnie!" I love my workout ladies...look at these fabulous people.



I now realize that I need to find the same discipline and mental change with my emotions. I don't know who my mental motivator should be. For now though, I will think of my Inner Arnie and have him kick some serious butt with all that crap in my life that I just can't control. Whack! Take that!